a dilemma

I feel a quandry, dearest 4.3 readers.

It's time for my second round of Starbucks applications to go out. There are also several full-time positions open at Stanford and at SC. What do I do?

I want the hours and flexibility of Starbucks. Also, I love coffee.

I want the money of a full-time job.

I feel guilty not using my Masters.

I want to be with Birdy during the day and watch her grow.

I want to be able to pay down our debt and maybe save for a house.

I don't want to put Birdy in daycare.

I don't want to pay a lot to commute, if anything.

I always thought that I would stay at home until my kid(s) went to kindergarten. I want my kids to be raised by me, instead of a daycare employee. Nothing against daycare employees, but its important to me to be there for Birdy. Well, either me or Brandon. Conversely, its good for Birdy to be with other little kids and be able to socialize and play with other kiddos. I also like money. Money is good.

If anyone has any advice, please to share it with me so at least I feel like I'm making a somewhat rational decision whatever I choose.


Jaclyn said...

Oh my, I think this is the biggest dilemma we moms and dads face. It stinks. I don't feel like there is the perfect answer...whatever we choose we have to give up something (at least for a while). You're definitely thinking through all of the stuff you should be. You'll just have to go with your gut and trust your instincts. Whatever you choose will be the right decision for you. I definitely have days where I wish I could drop T off and go to work for the day...but then I get to spend the day with her and I'm glad I didn't miss a second of it...so, I would like the best of both worlds, but I'll just settle for what I have right now. I'm sure you'll find the right choice for you. And, of course, if you find that magical solution where you get to stay home but still earn oodles of money, then let me know! :-)

Anonymous said...

now that i've entered mommyhood, it really is a hard decision. unfortunately for me, i don't get to make the decision - i have to go back to work in february... and it is killing me, just thinking about it. but, if i don't go back to work - we can't survive living the lifestyle we currently have... which includes a home mortgage. what i would give for paid maternity leave, of at least one year (if not longer)!

AngMomof3 said...

HB. Ugh. The time and energy we spend on this subject...

You'd have it good either way. But I'd encourage you to stay home with kiddos for a good segment of time. It. Goes. So. Fast.

Is that "good segment of time" now? Or is it after you have another baby too (um... are you?) Maybe work for awhile now and stay home for a couple years later???

You have the most "free time" now with one. Working later may be a bigger shuffle.

I'm ready to go back. But I haven't officially worked in almost 6 years. And my kiddos are growing up.

It has been great at home. But some days I wonder if spending time away from me would be a good thing. For all of us.

I'm sure you'll make the best decision for your family. Just pick one and do your best. People on both sides of the issue can choose to be great parents.

Michael said...

I was 2 when I started daycare and I think I turned out pretty well.

The bottom line is this: You are a good mom and you will continue to be a good mom regardless of what you decide to do about this dilemma.